27 8 / 2014

seekingwillow:

invisiblelad:

bonequeer:

radicalrebellion:

feministcaptainmorgan:

baronsledjoys:

firecannotkillafitblr:

This drives me mad. I used to work in a bookstore, and was talking to my coworker and he just yelled out “stop flirting with me!” at this ridiculous volume and it was humiliating because 
1. I wasn’t
2. I got in trouble for acting unprofessional 
3. He embarrassed me in front of a line of people
4. And he only stopped insisting that I was flirting when my boyfriend (who is now my husband) said, “dude, trust me, she’s not flirting with you” to him

That asshole respected my BOYFRIEND saying I wasn’t flirting more than he respected me saying it and I was the one who was talking! The whole scene got me in trouble at work. And the most ridiculous part is we were talking about a fucking book. In a bookstore.

One time, my ex boyfriend had a crush on some girl, and said that he thought he might have “a chance” with her.

When I asked him what made him think that, he said “Well, she talks to me.”

And this is why it is so difficult to be a girl and be friends with men who are attracted to women.

Can we also add that this is why a lot of women do the resting bitch face when out in public. Cause dudes swear a glance or a smile is flirting.

So yesterday something that perfectly illustrates this happened. I work at a fast food place and this guy comes in at 7am on a Sunday, still probably drunk from the night before, and when I smiled and said goodmorning he said “Did you just say that because you’re being paid to say that?” 

I repressed my urge to sarcastically answer, and said “Nope, I just enjoy saying hi to everyone!” To which he responded, “Oh, so you weren’t flirting with me then.”

Dude, I’m not flirting with your gross 7am-on-a-Sunday-ass, trust me.

My defense mechanism when I’m uncomfortable at work is to smile, so I did that and said “Is there anything I can get you this morning?” to which he responded,

"There, you just smiled! What does that mean?"

At this point I was fed up, so I said, 

"I smile at everyone sir, its just what I do. What can I get you, coffee, a bagel?"

And he said “I’m gonna be watching to see if you smile at everyone. I don’t like it when girls lie to me” and then ordered a coffee and a muffin like he hadn’t just said something at 11 on the “Is this guy a serial rapist” scale (where 0 is ‘no’ and 10 is ‘Yes, run away as fast as you can right now.”).

Then he sat there for another hour and a half, staring at me from his table. When he got up and left he came back to the counter, and said “You do smile at everyone. That’s fucked up.” and walked out.

I can’t even be innocuously polite and pleasant to people at my job (where customer service is the number one thing we are supposed to be focusing on) for fear of this shit happening. What happens if he had decided to wait until my shift was over? 

New Rule: If she’s at work, SHE’S NOT FLIRTING WITH YOU.

there are a lot of good takeaways from this thread, but mainly it reinforces my belief that hitting on servers (especially women) while at work is all sorts of screwed up because emotional labor is a very big part of their job and reading too much into that is presumptuous as hell. 

___

No one’s mentioned it in thread here (perhaps in the comments if I check?) but this is so rape culture it’s terrifying. Women must SO be available to all men all the time that ANY interaction between a woman and a man MUST equal flirting if it’s remotely pleasant or polite.

Which gets compounded with the hetero guys and girls can’t ‘just’ be friends and ‘don’t trust your girl if she’s friends with a guy’. Which some try to say is; ‘Oh I trust her, I just don’t trust him’. But the WHY of not trusting the guy is the same. The knowledge and awareness that women are meant to be available to all men at all times, until such time as a singular man stamps a claim on her and ‘good’ men will respect the ‘no trespassing’ sign.

Ugh.

And of course, this aspect of rape culture, this BEDROCK of rape culture explains ‘gay panic’ with hetero dudes. The thought that another guy could be interpreting anything polite or remotely pleasant THEY do as flirting…

The current era panic so high men and boys are throwing out that awful ‘no homo’ in order to ‘set the record straight’ - Pun intended. So much misogyny just embedded in culture.

*sigh*

One last note:

Expectation of Service From Black People - Particularly Black Women  + Rape Culture Mentality That Lack of Hostility Means Flirting = Sexual Objectification + Harassment on a Monumental Scale.

(Source: girlcodeonmtv, via consulting-timelord-of-mischief)

27 8 / 2014

vodkaand-cigarettes:

"I felt so angry at the UCSB massacre and the sexism we’re blind to everyday so I drew about my opinions on sexism to channel my rage."
Source http://rasenth.tumblr.com/post/86791553337/i-felt-so-angry-at-the-ucsb-massacre-an-article

27 8 / 2014

jenxmalone:

Since Johanna Mason was the only living female victor of 7 for the Quell, I would like to think that when they called up “Ladies first” she just stomped over, grabbed the piece of paper herself and shouted “GEE I WONDER WHO THE FUCK IT COULD BE? HOLY FUCK BALLS IT’S ME I’M SO SHOCKED” and the Peacekeepers have to drag her away from the microphone

(Source: johannabaeson, via startrebek)

27 8 / 2014

lastmimzy:

The cat’s like WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU BRING HOME

(Source: fiberstark, via pamplemoose)

27 8 / 2014

majiinboo:

  • Do not forget Michael Brown
  • Do not forget how the media dehumanized him and tried to justify his murder
  • Do not forget how peaceful protests were painted as savage riots
  • Do not forget police armed with military grade weapons terrorized and arrested black civilians
  • Do not forget Darren Wilson being awarded over $200,000 in fundraiser donations for murdering an unarmed black child
  • Do not forget that this system was not built to defend us, but to control us
  • Do not forget Ferguson 

(via corink)

27 8 / 2014

rosalarian:

pourquoi-nutmeg:

nortonism:

The thing about this is that sculptures like these in art history were for the male gaze. Photoshop a phone to it and suddenly she’s seen as vain and conceited. That’s why I’m 100% for selfie culture because apparently men can gawk at women but when we realize how beautiful we are we’re suddenly full of ourselves…

YES.

Girls don’t let anyone tell you loving yourself is vanity.

rosalarian:

pourquoi-nutmeg:

nortonism:

The thing about this is that sculptures like these in art history were for the male gaze. Photoshop a phone to it and suddenly she’s seen as vain and conceited. That’s why I’m 100% for selfie culture because apparently men can gawk at women but when we realize how beautiful we are we’re suddenly full of ourselves…

YES.

Girls don’t let anyone tell you loving yourself is vanity.

(Source: nevver, via allaboardthenopetrain)

27 8 / 2014

27 8 / 2014

homebeccer:

flying-prussian-pugs:

rules-broken-fate-rewritten:

stickthinmodels:

feminspire:

YES!

IMPORTANT

the second one? i can buy that somewhat. the first one? breasts are sexual organs.

I SWEAR TO FUCK. NO. NO THEY ARE NOT. BREASTS ARE MEANT TO FEED BABIES. BREASTS ARE NOT MEANT FOR SEXUAL FUCKING PLEASURE. BREASTS SOLE EVOLUTIONARY PURPOSE ARE TO FEED THE YOUNG, NOT TO HUMOUR MEN IN BED.

jesse oh my god

(Source: the-real-f-word-feminism, via dontbeanassbutt)

27 8 / 2014

furbearingbrick:

aimeefrommars:

septemberism94:

schim:

Cats who can’t figure out walls [x]

PLEASE TAKE YOUR CAT TO THE VET IF YOU SEE THEM DOING THIS BEHAVIOR OVER TIME.

It’s called “head pressing” and it occurs in dogs and cats. 

Head pressing is characterized by the compulsive act of pressing the head against a wall or other object for no apparent reason. This generally indicates damage to the nervous system, which may result from a number of varying causes, including prosencephalon disease (in which the forebrain and thalamusparts of the brain are damaged), or toxic poisoning.

http://www.petmd.com/cat/conditions/neurological/c_ct_headpressing

http://www.vet.cornell.edu/FHC/health_resources/toxoplasmosis.cfm (head pressing is listed as a symptom)

http://sevneurology.com/patients/clip-multilobular-osteochondroma (About a dog’s brain tumor but head pressing is listed as a symptom)

I wasn’t going to reblog this until I read the important caption dang thank you!!!

YOU JUST SAVED THE LIFE OF MY CAT THANK YOU!

SPREAD THIS LIKE WILDFIRE. THIS COULD SAVE YOUR KITTIE’S LIFE!

(Source: fuckyeahfelines, via supermaniackles)

27 8 / 2014

moonglade-poetess:

tastefullyoffensive:

Bop it, Twist it, Pull it, Spin it, Flick it.


fixed it.

moonglade-poetess:

tastefullyoffensive:

Bop it, Twist it, Pull it, Spin it, Flick it.

fixed it.

(Source: memewhore, via theonlymack99)